911

Dispatcher: "Did someone call 911?"
Emily: "Er.. uh, yes I did. Sorry. I... well, we have to dial 9 and then 1 and sometimes I accidentally press 911."
Dispatcher: "Try not to do that."
Emily: "Yes, ok sorry. it was not intentional."

Video: 8:00 Coffee

Ahhh.. You may or may not have seen our other infomercial, but we are just two office co-workers who enjoy good products.... So sue us- no, don't sue us. That is opposite of the point we are trying to make.  

.

George is fratty

me:  were you in a frat??

Sent at 2:53 PM on Monday

George:  hate frat's

they suck

they are from hell

me:  answer the question!!!

George:  no

me:  ok thnx.

Dwight Schrute's Rant List

Christobal's Rants:

1. The construction of kid's shoes
2. grass (especially in relation to city ordnances)
   
3. US government
   
4. bridesmaids dresses (“bridesmaids should be allowed to wear a nice pair of slacks if they want to")
5. problems for long torsos
   
6. candy (American confectionary is pathetic) 
   
7. Dora the Explorer (terrible theme song)
   
8. government clearance levels
   
9. TV (sucks)
   
10. propaganda of American Universities
11. traditions/brainwashing (ie: Aggie ring)
    
12. ice 
    
13. celebrating birthdays, anniversaries, etc
    
14. National Recognition Days (Secretary Appreciation Day, etc)
    
15. diamonds (“intrinsically worthless”)
    
16. laziness/gluttony
    
17. standing on escalators (wasting one's youth)
18. 2002 Jaguar (being a glorified Ford Taurus)
    
19. dental care
    
20. the “founding fathers” of American/Revolution (all lies)
    
21. poor floor division for AC ventilation
    
22. poor uses of space
    
23. Disney World (boring, ridiculously long lines)
    
24. having a Degree being more important than experience (bologna)
    
25. makeup (and its overuse)
    
26. insect bits in food
    
27. the sun is actually good for your skin (Vitamin C)
    
28. tools (cheaply made hole punch)
    
29. Building codes in America (modern buildings only built to last 20-30 years)
    
30. Burger King (it's disgusting)
    
31. unprepared journalists
    

Video: Infomercial

PX90

For the last 10 days Jorge has come into the office a little different....

Emily & Marni: Jorge, you look different...

Jorge: Yeah..... I'm doing this trendy exercise...It's called PX90.
Emily & Marni: Ooooh!!

Jorge does a little demonstration of some of the moves, nearly busting the seam of his pants.

A few days later...

Emily & Marni: Hey, how the PX90 going??
Jorge: Oh, I'm actually only doing P90...the X comes later.
Marni: Oh, how's the P90 going?

Jorge: Actually call it Power 90, so it doesn't sound like urine.
Marni: Oookkkk...how's the POWER90 going?

Jorge spends the rest of the day in his cave, and when he does emerge, he's usually in some sort of boxing stance.... punching the air frequently. 

Today, Jorge comes in... limping.

Emily: Jorge what happened???

Jorge: I stubbed my toe.

Emily & Marni: How????

Jorge: Riding my son's big wheel....

Emily & Marni:  hahahahhahahaha

Jorge: I could have seriously gotten hurt.

Emily: Jorge, you are over 200 pounds, why did you do that?? 

Jorge: It was better than carrying it home.

Emily thinking: (Was it Jorge? Was it really better??)
Marni: So I guess you couldn't do P90 this morning?
Jorge: It's Power90...and, OH - I still did it! On one foot!

We cheer, and Jorge limps back into his office, a triumphant look on his face.

Video: Better late than never.

The Office's tribute to the King of Pop.... the Moonwalk.

Shout out of the day

Jennifer Cranfill... for your constant gchat support. 

Where's Waldo?

Welcome Diego y Juan

May you live long and the force be with you.